Puppies and centerpieces

The MAtH (man about the house) and I are smiling at Dianne Isbell's Monday Etiquette column in the Belleville News-Democrat today because she's explaining puppies.

Me:  Dianne got a question about traveling with a puppy today.

MAtH:  Riley!

Me:  Exactly what I thought.

MAtH:  So what is the puppy question?

Me:  Ok, here it is, it's pretty long so I'll cut to the chase.

MAtH:  Bless you.

Me:  "We told my brother earlier this summer that we would come to his house for Christmas. He and his wife have been asking us to come for the last two years. It's a long driving trip, though, and we just received a puppy from one of my other brothers for our youngest daughter. What a predicament we have with what to do about taking this puppy with us."

MAtH:  That's the short version?

Me:  Well, background information.  Here's the rest.  "My husband doesn't seem to think it's a problem because they have two dogs in their house already, so what's one more for just a few days? I think we should ask my brother if we should bring the puppy. What's the right thing to do?"

MAtH:  Oh boy.  The other family already has two dogs.  I can just see a puppy coming into that mix.

Me:  I'd love it.

MAtH:  I'm sure you would.

Me:  However, a full house of people and gifts and wrapping paper and food and three dogs might just be a bit much.

MAtH:  I like how the husband doesn't think it would be a problem, he probably knows his brother-in-law.

Me:  The sister is the one who would have to work around the decorating and cooking while the men got the puppy all riled up.  Haha    Riled up. 

MAtH:  The best scenario for what to do about the puppy would have been for the host family to invite the dog right off the bat.  A family with two dogs would know about the puppy and also know what a problem it is to know what to do with one over the holidays.

Me:  That doesn't seem to be the case, though.

MAtH:  So what does Dianne say?

Me:  "So how would you and your husband like the idea of having your brother visit with his family plus two dogs if you did not know the dogs were coming? It would be very impolite and inconsiderate to take your new puppy without asking."

MAtH:  Hahaha  That's the Dianne we know so well.

Me:  She said the sister and brother in law might say yes when they really want to say no.

MAtH:  Yes  No  yes  no

Me:  Dianne also suggested leaving the dog in a kennel while they were gone.

MAtH:  Good luck finding one with room.

Me:  Then she really kicks into high gear with advice on what they should do if they end up taking the dog.

MAtH:    Uh huh.

Me:  "Complete a doggy training class"

MAtH:  Too late, not enough time for that now.

Me:  She believes that a doggy training class would "help insure that the puppy"  did not jump on the furniture...

MAtH:  Unless invited.

Me:  "Does not jump on people"

MAtH:  Unless food is in their hands or its happy to see them.

Me:  "Does not soil in the house"

MAtH:  Soil?

Me:  Haha  "Does not steal food from the table or the counter"

MAtH:  Bwahahahahahaha.  I seem to remember Riley pulling the box with the coffee cake off the island the other day and having quite a breakfast.

Me:  Haha.  That was pretty funny.  He's a stealth food thief, you don't hear him til it's too late.

Me:  "Does not bark incessantly"

MAtH:  Unless the mail person is at the door.  Or another dog walks by.  Or a car honks.

Me:  The problem with Dianne's answer is this couple probably wouldn't get the dog training they need to avoid all of these issues. 

MAtH:  Right, there's not enough time.

Me:  But there is time for one more question.

MAtH:  Oh no.  Please.

Me:  Just this one:  "There were four of us seated at a table for eight. The hostess had a grouping of little turkeys, gourds and a floral arrangement and little pumpkins at the other end of the table. After we were in the car on the way home, my husband mentioned this and thought it odd all of this wasn't in the center of the table instead.

I thought a centerpiece should be in the center, too. Is this something new per the younger set?"

MAtH:  Wait a minute.  The husband mentioned the centerpiece on the way home?  No way.  I'm sorry, no way at all.  Us guys do not notice centerpieces unless they are blocking the food.

Me:  Well, that's what the woman claimed. 

MAtH:  Let me get this straight.  There were 4 people sitting at a table for 8, probably sitting two across in the middle.

Me:  But it doesn't say that.  She says the grouping of little turkeys, gourds and flowers were at the other end of the table.

MAtH:  So that means they put the 4 people at one end of the table.

Me:  Looks like it.  I picture one of those movies that has one rich couple eating all by themselves at one end of a huge table.

MAtH:  But, getting back to the centerpiece thing, it's very hard to see and talk to someone across the table when flowers are too high. 

Me:  I know we moved our centerpiece this Thanksgiving to one end when we ate.

MAtH:  So what does our Dianne have to say?

Me:  "As Helen Sprackling said in her book..."

MAtH:  What? 

Me:  Helen Sprackling, you've heard of her.

MAtH:  No, have you?

Me:  No.  hahahaha, but she must be a source authority for Dianne

MAtH:  A handy reference guide.

Me:  Anyhow, this Sprackling woman said, "Don't make all your 'centerpieces' in the center. We are such creatures of habit that we seldom think that we can ...be as original as we like. Decorations can be placed wherever they contribute to the good taste and the charm of the complete setting, not only in the center, at either end, but in any number of unusual spots."

MAtH:  Thus far the lesson...from 1882.

Me:  Putting the centerpiece on the end makes sense.

MAtH:  Unless there is a puppy guest, very easy for him to take down.